Today, within ten minutes of each other, my Bloglines threw up this Penny Arcade comic “Unfair Business Practices” and this post by the Passionate Eater.
I’m not going to knock the Girl Scout cookies. I’m a customer for life, because like all good marketers, they got me early.
Like a lot of important people, I was a Girl Scout for nine years, right into high school. The cookie sales are THE fundraiser for Girl Scout troops, about 80-90% of the individual troop budget comes from the $0.55 cut they get out of your cookie purchase, and all the camps and trainings and event days (which are THE BEST part of being a Girl Scout) come from the two bucks the local council gets.
But what both the Passionate Eater and my sekrit boyfriends over at Penny Arcade point to is that it’s hard to resist a cute widdle kid in the green vests.
When you’re a pimply, gangly, gawky teenager in a blue vest, people don’t think twice about saying, “Aren’t you TOO OLD to be a Girl Scout?”
I always wanted to invent a time machine so I can go back to the jerks who repeatedly said that to us as we tried to sell our cookies, “Without Girl Scouts in middle and high school, I wouldn’t have half the leadership skills I do! And I’m a teenage girl standing over there! My self-esteem is already two steps from diving off into Insanityland, you’re saying that having a group that’s designed to empower me to be my own woman and not listen to jackwads who say my worth is directly tied to how well I act and dress and behave like Slutty McSlutterville is a BAD THING?!?!”
This year, though I searched valiantly, there were no Girl Scout parents/grandparents/neighbors in my circle of acquaintances. So I went to the Columbia River Council webpage to see if I could track down a local troop, and they had a form to fill out to ORDER GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.
Hot damn. I loves me the Internet.
But the great joy I got was when the delivery came. And my dealer was of middle-school age.
I had bought five boxes (Tagalongs, Trefoils, Samoas, Thin Mints, and one for the local food bank), which came out to $17.50. I handed the kid two twenties and said, “Keep the change.”
I confused her, but damn, it was nice to see an older Girl Scout.