Answering some of the Google Search Term Questions

These are things that brought people to my blog this week.

type of lunch aids person can eat

Uh, the kind with food in it?

best places to dine alone in napa

Anywhere you damn well please. Although I like Taqueria Rosita and Uva Trattoria.

why does mold grow on fruit if left out

Because you failed biology class.

is haagen-dazs still making sticky toffee

Not that I know of. Which isn’t too big of a loss.

where to eat brunch in portland, or

Sckavones. Zells. Pine State. Cameo Cafe. Equinox.

fat woman eat “whole chicken”

What? I mean, I might be able to, if I haven’t eaten anything else all day and you give me a couple hours, but I don’t like chicken that much. And does this include the bones, because me and the Surgeon General both don’t recommend that practice.

i eat bread every day

Um, okay. Thanks for sharing.

words to describe eat

Now you’re just confusing me.

watch kings nbc

Good idea. I fully support it.

Submitted Without Comment

Via The Leaping Thought.

Pine State Biscuits poised to become even more crowded.

I stopped by Pine State this morning for breakfast ’cause it was before 9am and I wanted something fast (if it was after 9, I would have gone to Burgerville because the line at Pine State would have made the wait redonk). At 8.40am, one of the three tables was empty!

But as I waited for my delicious biscuit with sausage and cheese, I noticed some fugly spraypainted stuff on the wall by the bathroom. Part of it was a Food Network logo. It took me a minute to translate the graffiti-font which read “Guy Ate Here”.

Guy Fierei, nee Guy Ramsey Ferry, also known as that loud guy who frequently has orgasms on TV in restaurant kitchens.

I don’t like him. Can you tell?

There was an autograph under the spraypaint with “3/09″. You know as soon as that segment airs, there is going to be a frickin’ line three times around the block. If you haven’t gotten around to visiting 37th and Belmont between the hours of 7am and 2pm any day of the week for your biscuit lovin’, do it soon, yo.

Tis raining, and I am drinking tea.

Also? Eating enchilada casserole.

And working at my desk. Which is a real feat, since for the lasrt five months you couldn’t get near it for all the crap piled on and around it.

I’ve also decided not to dick around with ‘desk chairs’, and I’m sitting in my EKTORP TULLSTA. Since I swapped the regular legs out for CAPITA, it works pretty well.

Thus is my life. I kinda like it this way.

Wow.

This is the prettiest French Press I’ve ever seen.

Doesn’t mean I’m going to be converting to French Press anytime soon (too much crap to clean for a confounded cup of coffee! Oooh, alliterative rant!) but it’s shiny.

HT to Cook & Eat.

The best sentence to ever be printed in a comic

New girl! What are you titting around with down there?

So says I. And I’m Mary Sue, so you know I’m right.

From the latest episode of Freakangels, so go read it or else Internet Jesus will… stop cussing and being generally awesome or something, I dunno, I’m making empty threats.

(One of the highlights of the last five years for me was when I commented on Warren Ellis’ Livejournal and he told me to get off his lap. Yes, that’s up there with my friends S and T’s new baby boy, who’s all of 20 hours old.)

(Babies are awesome. Warren Ellis is awesome.)

(Warren Ellis is not allowed near S and T’s baby, though. Because smell is the biggest trigger of memories there is, and if anyone’s going to be related in the kid’s memory to alcohol fumes and smoke, that’s Tantie Mary Sue, yo.)

Eating out less? Not me!

Last week I ate out at THREE places. Even better, I ate at three places that were new to me! Here’s some mini review thingies.

Saturday, I braved the rain and the line to eat at Zells Cafe. I know I usually say that if there’s a line at a brunch place in PDX that it’s not worth it? Zells is totally worth it. Servers showed no problem with me being a solo diner. I had the 2+2+2, two eggs, two bacon and two pancakes, and everything was good– except I forgot to order the eggs scrambled hard and they were runny and gooshy and I couldn’t finish them. :p My fault. Noisy, family friendly joint.

Tuesday night, I met up with a friend at Urban Farmer. Warning: Web page has annoying flash and autoplay music. We were there for Happy Hour, and when they say small plates, they mean SMALL. However, the Wagyu slider was more than enough to sate my appetite (and get cornmeal all over myself, they dust the bun in it). My friend had the pork belly and the foie gras hb&j. I pretty much want to go back just to try the foie gras hb&j now. The trick, though, is in finding the door. So here’s the trick: Look for the door for The Nines, and take the elevator up to the lobby. The space is big and divided into many nooks and crannies for conversation.

Then on Friday I had a SERIOUS ramen craving. After work, I flew solo and headed over to Biwa, or attempted to. I got lost. Basically, look for the sandwich board and/or the red paper lanterns– or if you know where Simpatica is, it’s next door. A couple of things: the ‘chinese style’ pork is not char sui but some kind of grilled pork belly (yum!) and the egg is hardboiled, not raw and whisked in. The noodles? Perfect. The broth? Dense and flavorful, but bland beyond telling. Needed salt, and I didn’t even think to ask for it (because me=dumb, see above re: scrambled eggs). I wasn’t thrilled with spending $4 on a 12oz bottle of Lagunitas, but I was right, it complimented the ramen very well. I also felt like I was being rushed out, despite the fact I arrived at 5:10pm. The waiter kept coming to check on me, pretty much every time I was conveying noodles from bowl to mouth, and asked me at one point if I wanted to box up the rest of my ramen. I was out the door by 5:45pm, and I felt like I was practically being shoved out. (Oh, I also amused myself by figuring out how many of their fixtures, furniture, and servingware came from IKEA. Verdict: a lot. Hee.)

Crisis in Infinite Cubicles!

My office is out of coffee.

O-U-T. We’ve drunk the funny coffee, the emergency coffee, and the last-ditch coffee.

We’re down to TEA, people! This is not a drill!

ETA: I have sourced some coffee for the office. I am now widely regarded as a hero. I’m also not telling anyone where I got it. This is why I’m in procurement and logistics.

Kings. NBC. Sunday nights. WATCH IT.

Migrane yesterday after work.

Which means I did not get to squee here about my newest favoritest show.

Kings. NBC. Sunday nights.

Reason to watch it if you’re not a hobbyist Hebrew Scripture scholar: Cross between the best parts of West Wing and Brothers and Sisters.

Reason to watch it if you’re not a hobbyist Hebrew Scripture scholar and you are into that kind of thing:
Pretty boys in uniforms!

Reason to watch it if you are a hobbyist Hebrew Scripture scholar:
Retelling of the King Saul and David story!

Reason to watch it if you are a hobbyist Hebrew Scripture aware of modern readings of the story of David and Jonathan:
Jake Benjamin is GAY! *all sorts of glee*

Watch the first episode here, for free!!!!!

The stupid, it burns.

John Rogers is the first to bring it to my attention, but not the last.

He quotes from Television Week:

“The name Sci Fi has been associated with geeks and dysfunctional, antisocial boys in their basements with video games and stuff like that, as opposed to the general public and the female audience in particular,” said TV historian Tim Brooks,

*looks down* Yep. Female. BAD HISTORIAN! CITE YOUR SOURCES!

“What we love about this is we hopefully get the best of both worlds,” Mr. Howe said. “We’ll get the heritage and the track record of success, and we’ll build off of that to build a broader, more open and accessible and relatable and human-friendly brand.”

Oh, now he’s prejudiced against Alternate Intelligences.

Sci Fi is coming off the best year in its history. In primetime it ranked 13th in total viewers among ad-supported cable networks in 2008.

So, now they’re alienating their core audience (by refusing to acknowlege we exist, oh please, don’t even think that Eureka’s major fan base is MALE).

BRILLIANT STRATEGY! They all need to go work for AIG now!