An Abomination Unto the LORD

Spotted in the 30s on Belmont last night:

People standing on their porch, drinking Franzia Rose box wine out of brandy snifters.

WITH BENDY STRAWS.

Mary Sue’s Awesome Tuna Salad Pita Sammich

Harhar! I made up tasty foods! All in an effort to avoid mayonaise and eat tuna, because I hate mayonaise and like tuna.

Mary Sue’s Awesome Tuna Salad Pita Sammich

1 can tunafishies, drained
1/4 cup frozen corn
3 radishes, choppy chopped
1 glug of olive oil
Cilantro, Pepper, and Salt to taste.
Mustard
Pita breads

Mix up tunafishies, corn, radishes, olive oil, cilantro, pepper and salt. Stuff in a container. Drag the container to work the next day and at lunchtime stuff contents of container into pita breads. Dose liberally with mustard.

 

Snickers Charged

My coworker just told me there are caffinated Snickers bars.

 

BABY WANT!

Anyone in PDX spotted these?

Belmont has been invaded by knitters.

<em>This post contains nausea-inducing content. You’re warned.</em>

This was going to be a post extolling the virtues of the <a href=”http://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g52024-d941388-Reviews-Opposable_Thumb_Gallery_Cafe-Portland_Oregon.html”>Opposable Thumb Cafe</a> and especially their double chocolate hazelnut cookies (which I am eating right now with a lovely cup of Ristretto Roasters drip coffee).

But there are <em>knitters</em> here.

I have nothing against knitters, per se. They don’t bug me on the bus at all. I have even been known to put needle to wool and create small stuffed Cthullus. Lately, though, the <em>knitters</em> are everywhere. They’re at Rocking Frog, they’re at Opposable Thumb, they were even at It’s A Beautiful Pizza the other night.

Here’s the thing about <em>knitters</em>… the amount of disgusting and inappropriate sex-related gossip increases the less-apropriate the setting is. For example, tonight when I walked in, the <em>knitters</em> were discussing vaginal discharge (I am not making this up). Then, small children entered the shop and they started discussing one of their mutual acquaintance’s infidelities. In glaring detail. I could pick this gentleman’s genetalia out of a lineup now.

Please, if you are a <em>knitter</em> or know one, remind them to beware what they say when they are knitting in public. Because you never know when a blogger is sitting nearby.

A documentation of the foodstuffs in my desk drawer

• 1 lb steel-cut oatmeal
• 3/4 lb spanish peanuts
• 5 or 6 corn tortillas
• 1 14-0z jar of Nestle Milo (a malted milk drink popular in SE Asia)
• 1 pint deli container filled with a 4:1 mixture of sugar and cinnamon
• 1 box Stash Organic Green Tea
• 4 oz loose leaf black tea from Hawthorne Tea Merchant
• 1 bottle of multivitamins and 1 bottle of iron pills
• Hardware: 3 unopened sets of chopsticks, 1 opened set of chopsticks, one cello-wrapped fork-spoon-napkin set, 1 ceramic bowl, 1 plastic Cool-Whip container (American Flag pattern) and 14 paper plates.

In my office, this is considered an understocked food drawer.

 

The True Impact of My Employment Decision

March 30th was my last day at IKEA.

I just realised this means I no longer have an excuse to stop at Pine State Biscuits on Saturday mornings.

I think I might cry.

(Or, you know, start walking down there and back because 1. I’ll have the chance to experience this thing called a ‘weekend’ people keep talking about, and 2. Even at 7am there’s never any open seats, and 3. People tell me exercise is good for you.)